Sunday, March 21, 2010

Match dot com. Cycle # 6

They said it couldn't be matched. Our hearts were not expecting such matchery or should I say match-rimony. Well I present to you

PHIL +MEGAN+ AUSTIN= cycle six
it's the perfect trifecta. He's Asian. She can't read. and he's going to Columbia med school for the blind.



He works at struck and that's just what you'll be when you see his raging biceps. He loves STD(s). He's in not one, not two, but two bands. He has naturally curly hair but straightens it everyday so Austin get your flat iron.

She's tall, puffy knees, really funny. Loves kitty half-sleeves (has an appointment for three at tits, tats 'n things on 11th so get ready to get some ink done). Has room for two boys in her bed. She makes you read her blog out loud to her, so put on your reading glasses guys.

His motto "ever heard of me? if not, then don't even bother." His m.o. playing games he knows he will win, direct quote: "I have the high score on all my friends' iphone games." He also has the high score on Paul Moyle's heart. His parents will make you a sandwich and his eyes will make you not a virgin. and if med school doesn't pan out he can make a helluva billboard slogan.

Why it will work. Direct quote from Austin, "I guarantee that I'm better than your boyfriend at everything." Austin is obsessed with Phil, and Phil is indifferent and that's just what Austin needs. She's a solid B, give her an asian and cocky S.O.B. and we got a stew going.

Terms and conditions
This was constructed under the use of laughter and big red. If any of the above individuals are dating someone, I was not aware of this status and will be willing to re-sign you to your current co-partner(s). These matches do not incorporate proximity of individuals but do incorporate a high likelihood of falling in love. If marriage does occur for this blog post I retain a 33% input into bridesmaids and polyandry residential location. If one of the partners acts upon said match I will be willing to reimburse first date cost up to $20.00 usd (Am I asking you guys on a date or what?). If you are not listed in the above post, do not be offended, this is due to one of the following reasons: you are not single (according to facebook), I'm waiting to find the prefect match for you, or you're a Chris Douche.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Look what came in the mail today

All the way from Seattle!


oh the places he's been.



Welcome back.

Thanks Jill

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Match dot com. Cycle #5

Katie and Darren? Dane... Dan? whatever the hell his name is...



She's a musician. and she just might be a magician too. She's going to be my nother roommate...? She's got great bangs and I hear she can give a mean shoulder rub. So start getting some tense shoulders Dane Cook. She's allergic to cats, but not mad about living with one.

His motto "bros before hoes, unless the hoes fake bake" so start tanning Katie. He has a basketball court in his house, I'm just going to throw that in there. Loves to text "I'm pissed" in boring social situations. Doesn't really like hanging out with me (or me in general) but he still deserves to be in love. He highly enjoys very structured organized ridged games with the losing cost being a suicide chip of death (reader warning: not as cool as text of death) and um... he really likes the Utah Jazz... oh and he has a dog named boozer.


Why it will work- I don't really know a lot about him but I also don't know a lot about her. Both are eye candy. He lives by Steph. She is going to be living with Steph. Both can probably spell better than me. He loves pretty young things and she's one. She loves tall dark and boy and he's one! This my be a match with limited information but it is a MATCH nonetheless.

Terms and conditions
This was constructed under the influence of new housing and Beans. If any of the above individuals are dating someone, I was not aware of this status and will be willing to re-sign you to your current co-partner. These matches do not incorporate proximity of individuals but do incorporate a high likelihood of falling in love. If marriage does occur for this blog post I retain a 28% rights to his basketball court and half ticket prices to Katie's shows. If one of the partners acts upon said match I will be willing to reimburse first date cost up to $20.00 usd. AND IN ADDITION Breanne Chipman/chapmen will also front $15 usd of date costs (that's $35 dollars just for making out). If you have not be listed in a match dot com post, do not be offended, this is due to one of the following reasons: assumption of your single status was negative, I'm waiting to find the prefect match for you, or you're Austin Rory Hackett.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

Out of all the Oscars awarded

the one I'm most happy about is best score: UP



do do doo do do doo dododo do do doo do do doo....

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Do I sense a theme?

I cannot get enough of these people







oh and this guy, but he's a curve ball.