Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Explaining Seattle to Utah


Being back in Utah I get questioned about my life in Seattle a lot. Since I don't currently go to school or have a job my normal response to basic questions is "no." For example: "So do you have a job in Seattle?" "Are you going to school up there?" "Do you have a lot of gay friends now?" "Have you found how Stella got her groove back?" and "what do you do all day?" A "no" response to these question has a negative connotation, which leads people to believe that I am not contributing my part to society. Lucky for me I planned a pre-emptive strike before I came to Utah to avoid such judgments.
The plan is two fold.
First, I prepared responses and deceivers for common questions. This is how it’s done: when people ask what I’m doing in Seattle I say waiting to hear back from Seattle U's grad school. The trick is to emphasis the words “grad school” and then quickly mentions the crazy interview. At this point I go off on how weird the interview was and get people focused on that. Now these individuals aren't even thinking if I'm a valuable member or society, they're thinking "what would I have done in that interview" or "that is really weird."
This brings me to the second portion that I prepared- the pictures. I ask if they want to see pictures of my life in Seattle (pictures shown below). And they’re thinking, “Oh who is this attractive individual" and "That Megan appears to be a delight to be around." At this point I have successfully presented myself as a fun, intelligent, creative, easy on the eyes, well rounded, punctual, clean, healthy, energetic, tired, fashionable, hospitable, social, little gem.

It's that easy. meow.

3 comments:

imri said...

the rig is up! people will know....

kate said...

great usage of pre-emptive

Megan Whittaker said...

meg-i tried calling youuu..and I forgot your email address.